
Dear Taylor Momsen,
You are 16. Just though you should know because you seem to be little confused regarding your age vis-a-vis your dressing sense. And why, may I ask, are you so mad at the world? I mean, you’ve got a good enough role in, erm, possibly the most most watched television show in the world. What has the world done to deserve such utter hatred from you? Admitted, 16 may not be the best age to be – boy trouble, parent trouble, girl trouble, just trouble, acne – not the loveliest things in the world. But have you ever taken into consideration that you are earning 589342754937 times the amount any 16 year old does? Or the fact that you got to snog Chace-f**king-Crawford!? Just that would be enough to keep me grinning to my ears for 4638294673 years. You, however, seem unsatisfied.
And really, must you dress like that? Is it imperative for you to dress like a 27 year old? I’m no prude, but that, dear Taylor, is a little bit too much of cleavage for a 16 year old, no? And if you MUST wear that atrocious shade of red lippy, which does not suit you at all, you might want to think about applying it, I don’t know… less sloppily? And if you MUST have racoon eyes, then… No. There is no way ANYONE could look good with raccoon eyes. No, not even you. Shocking, yes? But that, dearie, is the harsh truth.
Your shoes are really gorgeous but they look awful with that dress. I mean, the least you could do is find a pair of shoes that go with that obnoxious excuse for a dress, yes?
Kisses*
Alexis
editor’s edit: feel free to leave a comment below with your OWN letter to Taylor, or anyone else in the cast. They might actually read it on this site! xoxo